Facebook creates a common language for friends
- 32 Comment
We (husband and I) attended the wedding of two college friends a few months ago. The two of us attended with many college friends we hadn’t “seen” in years.
However, it didn’t feel strange seeing and interacting with these people. Why? I am “friends” with them on Facebook and although we have not physically been in the same space we all felt connected. In fact, many of us began interactions with, “I saw on Facebook you’re…”
I remember learning in an interpersonal communications course that the number one reason long distance relationships don’t work is because people lose a common language (i.e. inside jokes, day-to-day happenings, etc). Through our concerted use of a social network, we had a new common language despite not seeing one another.
The common language is what kept the relationship in tact and allowed for us to bypass the awkward “so what have you been up to the last six years” questions.
Have you experienced something similar?
32 Comments on this post
Trackbacks
-
Terese said:
I can’t tell you how many times I have started a conversation with, “I saw on Facebook that…”. I do it with people I haven’t seen in a few months, let alone 6 years. It has definitely changed those awkward situations that you are talking about and how you stay connected with people.
December 15th, 2009 at 10:53 am -
PRsarahevans said:
I know what you mean, Terese. It was so great to bypass the awkwardness. I had a very similar experience for my high school reunion last year.
December 15th, 2009 at 10:56 am -
Anders said:
On the other hand, isn’t it sometimes just awkward and annoying that when you meet someone you haven’t seen for quite a while and you start off by saying something such as “You know, last month I got married” and get the answer “Yeah, I saw it on Facebook…”
What I mean is that sometimes everybody already knows everything, leading to a conversation consisting of meaningless small talks such as the weather etc.
December 15th, 2009 at 11:08 am -
PRsarahevans said:
It could get annoying, Anders. Annoying or not, you’re still able to jump into a conversation because of the common language.
December 15th, 2009 at 11:10 am -
tunguy3n said:
hey sarah, it is so true how social network can bring even the farthest friends closer to us, and talking to old friends is something very special, because they were with you during certain parts of you life that you might have forgotten but never forgot.
December 15th, 2009 at 12:07 pm -
Emily said:
I agree that it does facilitate common language. It helps you fall easily into face-to-faceconversations with people that you haven’t seen for awhile because you’re somewhat up-to-date on their life. Facebook and other social networks help me stay connected, especially since I mostly prefer them over phone conversations. Though, I wonder what would happen if I were to come across someone I’m friend with on Facebook yet never talk to! I feel like that would be more awkward.
December 15th, 2009 at 1:42 pm -
Aluminum Laptop Cases said:
Anders makes a good point about how facebook also limits the face-to-face conversations. When you already can see what’s going on in their life, there isn’t too much to ask about. Sure it may help start conversations, but I think those conversations would be much more in depth if you weren’t already stalking them on facebook.
December 15th, 2009 at 2:36 pm -
cash back with credit said:
This is yet just another testimony of the great FACEBOOK!! It’s a very true and real post…thanks for sharing!
December 15th, 2009 at 9:02 pm -
Robin said:
My closest friends live “away” from me. With Facebook, I get to be a part of their daily lives. We share laughs, can pick each other up when we need to and as an added bonus I’ve also been able to become friends with their husbands.
December 16th, 2009 at 9:00 am -
PRsarahevans said:
Have you had Facebook actually limit face-to-face conversations? I guess it’s never happened to me, so I’m very interested to know.
December 16th, 2009 at 5:02 pm -
Skye said:
I’ve run into other social media tools like blogs, LiveJournal, etc. limit face-to-face conversations, most likely due to people sharing a lot more information in a journal/blog post than they do on Twitter or Facebook. I’ve received the “Yeah, I saw it on Facebook…” response before and usually can continue the conversation with details that weren’t shared, or mentioning something they posted on Facebook and asking about it. However, it can be a conversation killer at times.
December 16th, 2009 at 5:53 pm -
Michael Schechter said:
Two of the things I love the most about FB… it allows us to live in the present and not have to waste much time catching up on the mundane as well as the ability to keep some of those tangential relationships intact that likely would have withered away if not for the touch points that SM allows for. Plus discovering some of the unknown connections is always a fun third perk
December 17th, 2009 at 12:21 pm -
Aluminum Laptop Cases said:
Michael I would have to disagree. What I like least about facebook is how much time it wastes. Without facebook, you wouldn’t spend hours on end just browsing photos of what other people are doing. That sounds pretty mundane to me.
December 18th, 2009 at 1:32 pm -
Rent College Books said:
This is a great insite into the “new” inside jokes and comunication that happens from all of this social media. there is many times that it seems that we are not really talking anymore just talking at eachother… to quote “supernews”
December 18th, 2009 at 5:03 pm -
blue cross tonik said:
This is yet just another testimony of the great FACEBOOK!! It’s a very true and real post…thanks for sharing!
December 24th, 2009 at 6:21 am -
Antalya evden eve nakliyat said:
Can I show this post on my blog?
December 28th, 2009 at 11:17 am -
facebook video said:
thanx for post
January 1st, 2010 at 7:16 am -
avril lavigne said:
Thanks to everyone for sharing.
January 1st, 2010 at 7:44 am -
malatya haber said:
thanx for post
January 1st, 2010 at 8:26 am -
youtube gir said:
thank you for entery
January 1st, 2010 at 8:51 am -
çizgi film izle said:
Two of the things I love the most about FB
January 2nd, 2010 at 9:13 am -
Aluminum Laptop Cases said:
Personally I’d rather hear about the whole story from friends instead of first seeing a preview through their facebook updates. I don’t like wasting time viewing everyone’s updates.
January 4th, 2010 at 3:31 pm -
Hair Salons said:
I don’t check this feature on the facebook. I’ll check it out.
January 6th, 2010 at 4:02 am -
facebook video said:
Thanks to everyone for sharing.
January 7th, 2010 at 1:28 pm -
textbook rental said:
much like avatar its a virtual world for people to explore share.
January 15th, 2010 at 4:32 pm -
printing said:
Thanks to everyone for sharing.
January 20th, 2010 at 8:27 am -
Bidet said:
That is so true, Facebook allows you to keep in touch with people, you haven’t seen in years. It feels like you know them because you can see what they are doing on facebook. So when you meet them in person, it isn’t as awkward. I have befriended people on facebook that I havent seen since childhood.
January 24th, 2010 at 2:34 pm -
direk izle said:
I agree that it does facilitate common language.
February 6th, 2010 at 12:39 am -
resimler said:
It’s a very true and real post…thanks for sharing!
February 7th, 2010 at 4:11 am -
youtube gir said:
great idea, thanks for sharing.
February 16th, 2010 at 8:44 am -
kelowna real estate said:
So isn’t it sometimes just awkward and annoying that when you meet someone you haven’t seen for quite a while and you start off by saying something such as “You know, last month I got married” and get the answer “Yeah, I saw it on Facebook…”
March 3rd, 2010 at 10:02 pm
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Sarah Evans, Jon Gay. Jon Gay said: Great call! Facebook creates a common language for friends – http://shar.es/a8EHK [...]